“Watch your thoughts, they become your words. Watch your words, they become your actions. Watch your actions, they become your habits. Watch your habits, they become your character. Watch your character, it becomes your destiny.”~ Lao Tzu

This quote by ancient Chinese philosopher Lao Tzu illustrates the importance of our words and helps us understand how gossiping could negatively influence our lives. Gossipers take note: Lao Tzu might have drank tea, but he certainly didn’t spill it!

GossipIng can have big consequences on our lives, impacting our mental health, emotional and social well-being, and, yes, even our destiny. 

When you engage in gossip, you’re not just hurting others—you’re also harming yourself. Gossip replaces deep, meaningful connections with negative and harmful energy. One comment might seem harmless —at worst embarrassing when a cringe comment you make about someone else finds its way back to haunt you. But realize the negative effects of gossiping can go much deeper than that.

Gossiping not only hurts others, it affects your character and damages your integrity. Gossiping immerses you in negative energy that affects your relationships and life experiences.

Yet it’s easy to get caught up in the energy of drama, rumors and gossip. So let’s take a mindfulness approach to stop wasting time on meaningless and negative conversation and avoid drama and gossiping once and for all. 

A Mindfulness Approach To Gossip And Conversation

Our words are extremely powerful vibrations that connect us with universal consciousness. Words help us manifest experiences in our lives. And choosing the right words carefully is a habit of master manifestors. Conversely, when we spread gossip about others, we attract more negativity into our lives.

A mindfulness approach to avoiding gossip invites us to look inward to understand why we are driven to spread rumors that could hurt others when we should just be minding our own business.

What Gossiping About Others Tells Us About Our Own Emotional Wellbeing

If you want to stop gossiping, it’s time to take a deep look inward. On the surface, it may seem that we gossip to connect with others or fit in because we are bored or to have a laugh. But the truth is, gossiping often says more about our state of mind than it does about the person we’re talking about.

In mindfulness, we realize how we treat and feel about others is like looking in the mirror to understand how we feel about ourselves. When you constantly focus on other people’s flaws, you reinforce a mindset of judgment and criticism of yourself as well. Deep beneath the gossip and harsh words, feelings of insecurity and dissatisfaction within yourself may reside. On an emotional level, gossip can be triggered by our own insecurities. For example, if we feel inadequate, pointing out someone else’s flaws might make temporarily feel better about ourselves. But this overlooks the root of our insecurities, which could even be making us unhappy and even physically sick.

Where Gossip Resides In The Energetic And Physical Body

On an energetic level, a tendancy to gossip usually shows up as an imbalance in the throat chakra. The throat chakra governs our ability to communicate truthfully and express ourselves authentically. When this chakra is out of balance, it can manifest as unclear communication and gossip. It also indicates our inability to speak our truth to both ourselves and others. A blocked throat chakra can manifest in physical symptoms as well, such as thyroid disease, sore throat, dental issues, mouth sores, TMJ, sinus infections, ear infections, difficulty hearing, among others.

How Our Social Circle Influences Our Conversation

Socially, much of who we become is influenced by who we surround ourselves with. It’s easy to fall into gossiping if you’re surrounded by gossipers. If you want to break the habit of gossiping, start to surround yourself with people who seem uninterested in spreading rumors or talking about others. Likewise, limit your time and conversation with gossipers who tend to get caught up in drama.

Mindfulness Strategies To Quit Gossiping And Spreading Rumors

Quitting gossiping won’t happen overnight, but practicing these mindfulness-based strategies over time will help you mindfully communicate positively, improve your emotional well-being, and shift your energetic imbalances.

Be Intentional.

Start each day by setting an intention to avoid gossip. Use affirmations like, “I choose to speak positively and uplift others,” or “I am mindful of my words and the energy they carry.” These affirmations will help you reinforce your commitment to expressing yourself clearly, with truth, and positively.

Set Boundaries.

Start to notice when you are surrounded by gossiping coworkers or friends, and create some distance and boundaries for yourself from those conversations. It’s okay to excuse or kindly explain that you refuse to be wasting time spreading gossip.

Shift the Conversation. 

As you become more mindful of gossip, you can take steps to steer the conversation in a more positive direction. If someone starts gossiping, try changing the subject and talking about more positive and uplifting topics.

Express Gratitude for Healthy Relationships.

Focus on the positive relationships in your life and express gratitude for the people who support and uplift you. This will help you reinforce the value of positive, gossip-free conversations.

Choose Your Words Carefully.

Socraties is attributed with suggesting we all consider the following questions before speaking, “Is it kind? Is it necessary? Is it true?” These questions can help you determine when to share your thoughts as words or when to filter your speech and rethink what is best to communicate. Or as my mom and everyone else’s said, “If you don’t have something nice to say, don’t say it at all!”

Meditation to Stop Gossiping and Speak Your Truth

To truly break free from gossip, it’s important to cultivate self-compassion and compassion for others. Meditation is a powerful tool to practice loving kindness towards yourself, enabling you to extend that same compassion to others.

One way to start is with a simple self-love meditation. Find a quiet space, close your eyes, and take a few deep breaths. Focus on your heart center, and imagine a warm, loving light radiating from within. As you breathe in, visualize this light growing brighter, filling your entire being with love and compassion. As you exhale, release any negative thoughts or judgments you may be holding onto.

Check out my self-love mindfulness and meditation practices on Aura to help you stop gossiping: 

• Expressing Unconditional Self-Love Meditation
• Serene Self-Acceptance Visualization Meditation
• Self-Love: More Please! Life Coaching

Mindfulness and meditation is key to overcoming gossiping and improving your physical, emotional and social wellbeing. These practices center around self-love and compassion to others to help you heal deep within, shift your energy and get at the root causes of spreading gossip. Practicing self-love meditations will support you in upholding personal integrity and motivate you to share more loving communication and radiate positivity to the world around you.

‍